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About Me

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Pragmatic, reserved and a deep thinker who loves family, sports especially football where am married to two wives: the first, AC Milan who has my loyalty and the second wife, Manchester United who has all my undying love and pampering, lifestyle and society parties. Need I say the law is more than a profession but a lifestyle for me.

Adekanye Adeyinka Olajide.

I do it for me

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One of the most important tools of having a lasting, successful relationship is effective communication; it is crucial to the sustenance of every relationship as it is the bridge to the gap between two separate individuals. Communication helps to understand each other better thereby creating a strong bond of mutual thoughtfulness. Effective communication bares a mind, revealing their intents leading to an absolute grasp of whom we are dealing with.

Consequently, many espouse that communication should be thorough, unambiguous, and sincere. In fact, with communication, they argue must be decisive, every issues properly discussed and attended to. They base their explanation on the enormous advantages of communication as it helps to show a state of mind and by extension, the personality in question since there is none that hears the thoughts of men – except God – or per chance you know any, please point that person to me.

Truly, the beauty of regular interaction rests in the fact that it is the oil that wheels general human relationship, making it fluid and devoid of frictions. This idea has consumed most that they forget to acknowledge the disadvantages of persistent communication, which belies the modern day relationship. Therefore, today I will be discussing those things they never told you about too much communication and its inherent challenges in today’s relationship. Do not be deceived, communication too as got a point where you just simply draw the line.

In a world where communication has become easier, faster, and cheaper, relationships have gone awfully sore beyond redemption and you begin to wonder: communicate all the time they said! Is that not supposed to be an advantage when you can reach our admirer on all sort of platforms from WhatsApp, Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, BBM, Viber, Wechat, SKYPE and the others you are familiar with. Well, apparently they were wrong! Here is why.

Have you ever sat down to think that by interacting on every platform available, calling and sending them messages, you begin to appear needy, desperate, and too dependent? All right, here is the deal, when you start flooding people with messages, calls, as well as checking up on them to show our interest and care, which trust me I know is most sincere; you begin to appear a little too clingy. This is a major turn off for most people because it gets too frantic for them; they start to read all the wrong meanings to your rather innocuous acts of care.

For some, your worrying attempt at reaching them with excessive mediums signals you as an insecure person because it is written all over you that you are too bothered with trying to impress them but you have failed to realise that you have become a nuisance. It is either they ignore you, hoping you will decipher the message, they use the parachute when they sight you, or they explore your desperation and begin to manipulate you haven seen elements of gullibility in you.

Another demerit of excessive communication is that it begins to choke the other party because they consider it as a form of monitoring. Once they feel throttled, they start to withdraw from you gradually slipping away until that relationship hits the rock altogether. Honestly, no matter how much you love someone, you need to give them some space initially; this makes them miss you, which makes you spot their feelings from their chase.

I for one do not believe in overwhelming someone I just met with calls, messages, and all forms of communication no matter how attracted I am to that person. I will not call so often even if I have your number; at least not until there is a concrete relationship between us though that does not guarantee a switch. I am of the opinion that one must respect the private life of the other person. I am only trying to be a part of it; not swallow it up that they lose their own identity.

I know some of you will be thinking how unromantic I am but love is a thing of the heart not what I have to impress to gain. Yes, the early morning messages does it or even the SMS you get when I go to pee midnight but other than that, I am only interested in working your heart, seeing you in person, spending time knowing you, revealing my weaknesses rather than beautifying them on phone, above all discerning a need for me.

God does not have to call you every day to remind you he loves you; you know it from his acts that are constantly reminding you of his presence. He smiles at you with the sun, shows up at the time of evil, romancing you through the night, sending his son to die for your sins, wooing you over daily with his grace, yet you love God wholeheartedly. I am not assuming the position of God but a person who loves you needs no convincing to give you an assured feeling of his or her love. That person shows it and you feel it!
Without trying to dent the effect of communication in relationships and general life, I am not suggesting that you communicate less but that you do so with utmost consideration and respect for the other person. Become a significant other with sincere actions, enchanting attitude, which melts the heart away rather than a nuisance with too much words lacking substantive value.

Yours sincerely,