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Pragmatic, reserved and a deep thinker who loves family, sports especially football where am married to two wives: the first, AC Milan who has my loyalty and the second wife, Manchester United who has all my undying love and pampering, lifestyle and society parties. Need I say the law is more than a profession but a lifestyle for me.

Adekanye Adeyinka Olajide.

I do it for me

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You are here: Home / WHOM ARE YOU LOVING?


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There is this family on my street that epitomise the classic Nigerian story. They are always constantly in a state of discord, volatile and very pugnacious. This family as much as they are a nuisance to the neighbourhood and a huge comical relief with different characters heighten the loss of family values in our society, as there are no days without altercations and curses exchanged in form of banters among parents and children, among siblings.

I have been able to garner that no child of this particular family attends any school or do so inadequately. Then I began to understand the reason for such level of acrimony and utter disobedience to parental orders. They must have assumed that their parents have failed and deprived them of their statutory and obligatory rights. This provoked spiral of thoughts as I began to reason on the things that associates with the person one chooses to love.

It is no doubt that who one loves goes beyond the individual as a person. It also matters where that person is coming from knowing that they are a part of a family. It is also of much importance the background, the history and orientation of the individual. I for one will definitely not want to fall in love with an individual from a rancorous family, an individual who does not know the consequence of regularly engaging in slanderous confrontation with parents. I really do not want to love a woman no matter how beautiful who is not cultured and classy.

I know for many, relationship an idea, which strictly based on love makes marriage a possible target once there is a burgeoning of the feeling; nothing else matters. I have even heard of many telling me they are capable of falling in love with a woman who is a sex worker as long as love triggered and she is willing to put an end to the job. For some, it is a woman that wins their heart with her elegance and Barbie beauty with striking semblance to a Goldberg bottle who has pierces in all the most sexual parts that spins their head.

In fact, I know of some men who do not care if their woman can cook or not as long as there are noodles available, they are good to go. Rightfully, one man’s food is the poison of another for some will fall in love with a partner who already has already made a team in children. Whatever an individual is inclined to loving in a partner is their choice bearing from how susceptible they are to their ingrained desires.

Indeed, it is true that one cannot know any individual completely; however, it is also unequivocally correct that parents shape the life of children as they are the first point of contact for relationship building and as caretakers, play the unenviable role of home training. Consequently, it follows those children most likely turn out to be what their parents are. I hope you get my drift. What I am trying to plough on here is that a lazy, dirty parent is most likely to rear a child in that; so are children from a quarrelsome home as that is the only way of life they deem normal.

Everyone wants love that is unconditional and accepts them completely. We all want to be involved in relationships that work; where we feel cherished and respected. If these are one’s true goals, then it is not overburdening to weigh deeply on the traits, habits, backgrounds of the person we are committing our time and life. It is cogent that we consider the effect of a wrong choice on our remote objectives.

It is our indifference and trivialising matters this crucial that has cost many their happiness. Many for this oversight have ended up with medically managed deranged persons or with barterers and others with various psychological disorders.

I therefore, ask whom are you loving?